Recent Updates Toggle Comment Threads | Keyboard Shortcuts

  • lczarnik 15:37 on December 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    Life Lesson for 2017 

    Forwarded message
    From: Ken W
    Date: 1 December 2016 at 11:19
    Subject: Fwd: Life Lesson for 2017

    LIFELESSON FOR 2016

    Sometimes we try too hard to get to the greener pasture and in the process, we end up in trouble.

    And when you find yourself in trouble and you’re stuck in a situation that you can’t get out of,

    there is one thing

    you should always remember,

    not everyone who shows up

    is there to help

    Take Good Care

    of Yourself

    My Friend

    Keep your head inside the fence!

     
  • lczarnik 07:30 on November 16, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    A Simple Yes or No Vote 

    Forwarded message
    From: Carol Z
    Date: 16 November 2016 at 01:34
    Subject: Fwd: A Simple Yes or No Vote

    Yes or No

    animated-light-bulb-gif-29.gif

    This vote only requires you to forward it to someone else for it to be counted.

    YES OR NO

    As many of you are aware, the Knights of Columbus submitted to congress that the words "Under God" should be added to our pledge of allegiance. Both Houses of Congress passed the law and it was signed by President Eisenhower in 1954. The information below was based on a poll taken by NBC on what percentage should keep the words in our pledge versus the percent who want it removed.

    If you read this and agree that "under God" should be left in the pledge, then just forward it to others and you have voted for it to be left in. If you delete it and don’t forward it you are voting NO to "under God." Easy, huh?

    "I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."

    Shock to NBC

    This is not sent for discussion. If you agree, forward it … If you don’t, delete it. I don’t want to know one way or the other. By my forwarding it, you know how I feel.

    86% to keep God in the Pledge of Allegiance and 14% against. That is a pretty commanding’ public response.

    I was asked to send this on, if I agreed or delete if I didn’t. Now it is your turn. It is said that 86% of Americans believe the word God should stay. Therefore, I have a very hard time understanding why there is such a mess about having God in the Pledge of Allegiance.Why should our Nation cater to 14%?

    If you agree, pass this on. If not, simply delete.

     
  • lczarnik 08:23 on November 14, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    Why there are more women on Earth than men 

    Forwarded message
    From: Ken W
    Date: 12 November 2016 at 06:37
    Subject: Fwd: Why there are more women on Earth than men

     
  • lczarnik 13:59 on November 8, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    Dummy Still Performs After Ventriloquist Walks Off Stage 

    Forwarded message
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 5 November 2016 at 02:02
    Subject: Fw: Fwd: Dummy Still Performs After Ventriloquist Walks Off Stage

    http://1funny.com/ventriloquist-walks-off

    Dummy Still Performs After Ventriloquist Walks Off Stage

     
  • lczarnik 13:54 on November 8, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    Disney offered the author a job… after viewing this 

    Forwarded message
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 5 November 2016 at 01:56
    Subject: Fw: Fwd: Disney offered the author a job… after viewing this

    Disney offered the author a job… after viewing this

    https://youtu.be/0zJoYNS6XHU

     
  • lczarnik 13:48 on November 8, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    Time to hang up the car keys 

    Forwarded message
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 26 October 2016 at 11:36
    Subject: Fw: Fwd: Time to hang up the car keys

    How do you know when it is time to"hang up the car keys?"

    I say when your dog has this look on his face!

    A picture is worth a thousand words!

    I bet you will send this one on…… It made me smile, too!

     
  • lczarnik 13:46 on November 8, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    Aging! 

    Forwarded message
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 23 October 2016 at 09:49
    Subject: Fw: Fwd: Aging!

    I very quietly confided to my best friend that I was having an affair.

    She turned to me and asked, ‘Are you having it catered’?

    And that, my friend,

    Is the definition of ‘OLD’!

    ~ ~ ~

    Just before the funeral services, the undertaker

    Came up to the very elderly widow and asked,

    ‘How old was your husband?’

    ’96,’ she replied: ‘Two years younger than me’

    ‘So you’re 98,’ the undertaker commented.

    She responded, ‘Hardly worth going home, isn’t it?’

    ~ ~ ~

    Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman:

    ‘And what do you think is the best thing

    About being 104?’ the reporter asked.

    She simply replied,

    ‘No peer pressure.’

    ~ ~ ~

    I’ve sure gotten old!

    I’ve had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement,

    New knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes

    I’m half blind, can’t hear anything quieter than a jet engine,

    Take 40 different medications that

    Make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts.

    Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation;

    Hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.

    Can’t remember if I’m 85 or 92.

    Have lost all my friends. But, thank God,

    I still have my Florida driver’s license.

    ~ ~ ~

    I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape,

    So I got my doctor’s permission to

    Join a fitness club and start exercising.

    I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.

    I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour..

    But, by the time I got my leotards on,

    The class was over.

    ~ ~ ~

    An elderly woman decided to prepare her will and

    Told her preacher she had two final requests.

    First, she wanted to be cremated, and second,

    She wanted her ashes scattered over Wal-Mart.

    ‘Wal-Mart?’ the preacher exclaimed. ‘Why Wal-Mart?’

    ‘Then I’ll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week.’

    ~ ~ ~

    My memory’s not as sharp as it used to be.

    Also, my memory’s not as sharp as it used to be.

    ~ ~ ~

    Know how to prevent sagging?

    Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.

    ~ ~ ~

    It’s scary when you start making the same noises

    As your coffee maker.

    ~ ~ ~

    These days about half the stuff

    In my shopping cart says,

    ‘For fast relief.’

    ~ ~ ~

    THE SENILITY PRAYER:

    Grant me the senility to forget the people

    I never liked anyway,

    The good fortune to run into the ones I do, and

    The eyesight to tell the difference.

    ~ ~ ~

    ~ ~ ~

    THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:

    I don’t want to brag or make anyone jealous or anything, but I can still fit
    into the socks I wore in high school.

     
  • lczarnik 13:44 on November 8, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    HUMOR 

    Forwarded message
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 23 October 2016 at 09:44
    Subject: Fw: Fwd: HUMOR

    YOUR MORNING HUMOR!!.

    THIS IS WHAT
    A SENSE OF HUMOUR
    LOOKS LIKE

    THIS IS WHAT
    SAD LOOKS
    LIKE


    THIS IS
    WHAT
    SORRY LOOKS
    LIKE


    THIS IS
    WHAT
    BAD
    SPELLING
    LOOKS
    LIKE

    BAD
    JUDGMENT

    I’D
    RATHER HOLD
    IT


    PILE
    UP LOOKS LIKE


    THIS
    WILL
    MAKE
    YOU SMILE!

    HOW
    WAS
    YOUR
    CEREAL
    THIS
    MORNING?


    HOW
    TO HANDLE
    A
    PROBLEM
    NEIGHBOR


    Good
    Reason to
    Wear
    Pyjamas to
    Bed!!!


    Tattoo
    Of
    The
    Year

    It
    Doesn’t matter how
    Many people you send
    This to, just remember
    If it made you smile,
    Your friends will smile
    Too..

     
  • lczarnik 13:40 on November 8, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    80-year-old woman 

    Forwarded message
    From: Ken W
    Date: 4 November 2016 at 02:59
    Subject: Fwd: : 80-year-old woman

    A doctor that had been seeing an 80-year-old woman for most of her life finally retired. At her next checkup, the new doctor told her to bring a list of all the medicines that had been prescribed for her. As the doctor was looking through these his eyes grew wide as he realized Grandma had a prescription for birth control pills. "Mrs. Smith, do you realize these are birth control pills?" "Yes, they help me sleep at night." "Mrs. Smith, I assure you there is absolutely nothing in these that could possibly help you sleep!" She reached out and patted the young doctor’s knee and said, "Yes, dear, I know that. But every morning, I grind one up and mix it in the glass of orange juice that my 16-year-old Granddaughter drinks. And believe me it definitely helps me sleep at night." You gotta love Grandmas!

    A man was riding on a full bus minding his own business when the gorgeous woman next to him started to breast-feed her baby. The baby wouldn’t take it so she said, "Come on sweetie, eat it all up or I’ll have to give it to this nice man next to us." Five minutes later the baby was still not feeding, so she said, "Come on, honey. Take it or I’ll give it to this nice man here." A few minutes later the anxious man blurted out, "Come on kid. Make up your mind! I was supposed to get off four stops ago!"

    Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term exam. The last question was, ‘Name seven advantages of Mother’s Milk.’ The question was worth 70 points or none at all. One student was hard put to think of seven advantages. He wrote:

    1) It is perfect formula for the child.
    2) It provides immunity against several diseases.
    3) It is always the right temperature.
    4) It is inexpensive.
    5) It bonds the child to mother and vice versa.
    6) It is always available as needed.
    And then the student was stuck. Finally, in desperation, just before the bell rang indicating the end of the test he wrote:
    7) It comes in two attractive containers and it’s high enough off the ground where the cat can’t get it. He got an A.

    A woman and her 12-year-old son were riding in a taxi in Detroit. It was raining and all the prostitutes were standing under awnings. "Mom," said the boy, "what are all those women doing?" "They’re waiting for their husbands to get off work," she replied. The taxi driver turns around and says, "Geez lady, why don’t you tell him the truth? They’re hookers, boy! They have sex with men for money." The little boy’s eyes get wide and he says, "Is that true Mom?" His mother, glaring hard at the driver, answers "Yes." After a few minutes the kid asks, "Mom, if those women have babies, what happens to them?" She said, "Most of them become taxi drivers."

    An elderly, but hardy cattleman from Texas once told a young female neighbor that if she wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a pinch of gunpowder on her oatmeal each morning. She did this religiously and lived to the age of 103. She left behind 14 children, 30 grandchildren, 21 great-grandchildren, five great-great-grandchildren and a 40 foot hole where the crematorium used to be.

     
  • lczarnik 13:37 on November 8, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , ,   

    A THANKSGIVING REMINDER ..thank you 

    Forwarded message
    From: Ken W
    Date: 28 October 2016 at 07:44
    Subject: Fwd: A THANKSGIVING REMINDER ..thank you

    This is one of the nicest e-mails I have seen and is so true:
    I dreamt that I went to Heaven and an angel was showing me around. We
    walked side-by-side inside a large workroom filled with angels. My
    angel guide stopped in front of the first section and said, "This is
    the Receiving Section. Here, all petitions to GOD said in prayer are
    received."
    I looked around in this area, and it was terribly busy with so many
    angels sorting out petitions written on voluminous paper sheets and
    scraps from people all over the world.
    Then we moved on down a long corridor until we reached the second section.
    The angel then said to me, "This is the Packaging and Delivery
    Section. Here, the blessings the people asked for are processed and
    delivered to the living persons who asked for them." I noticed again
    how busy it was there. There were many angels working hard at that
    station, since so many blessings had been requested and were being
    packaged for delivery to Earth.
    Finally at the farthest end of the long corridor we stopped at the
    door of a very small station. To my great surprise, only one angel was
    seated there, idly doing nothing.. "This is the Acknowledgment
    Section," my angel friend quietly admitted to me. He seemed
    embarrassed.
    "How is it that there is no work going on here? " I asked.
    "So sad," the angel sighed. "After people receive the blessings that
    they asked for, very few send back acknowledgments."
    "How does one acknowledge GOD’s blessings? " I asked.
    "Simple," the angel answered. "Just say, "Thank you, Lord."
    "What blessings should they acknowledge?" I asked.
    "If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof
    overhead and a place to sleep, you are richer than 75% of this world.
    If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a
    dish, you are among the top 8% of the world’s wealthy."
    "And if you get this on your own computer, you are part of the 1% in
    the world who has that opportunity."
    "If you woke up this morning with more health than illness, you are
    more blessed than the many who will not even survive this day."
    "If you have never experienced the fear in battle, the loneliness of
    imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation… You
    are ahead of 700 million people in the world."
    "If you can attend a place of worship without the fear of harassment,
    arrest, torture or death, you are envied by, and more blessed than,
    three billion people in the world."
    "If your parents are still alive and still married….you are very rare."
    "If you can hold your head up and smile, you are not the norm, you’re
    unique to all those in doubt and despair……."
    Ok, what now? How can I start?
    If you can read this message, you just received a double blessing in
    that someone was thinking of you as very special and you are more
    blessed than over two billion people in the world who cannot read at
    all.
    Have a good day, count your blessings, and if you care to, pass this
    along to remind everyone else how blessed we all are.
    ATTN: Acknowledge Dept.
    "Thank you, Lord, for giving me the ability to share this message and
    for giving me so many wonderful people with whom to share it."
    If you have read this far, and are thankful for all that you have been
    blessed with, how can you not send it on??? I thank GOD for
    everything, especially all my family and friends.

     
c
Compose new post
j
Next post/Next comment
k
Previous post/Previous comment
r
Reply
e
Edit
o
Show/Hide comments
t
Go to top
l
Go to login
h
Show/Hide help
shift + esc
Cancel
%d bloggers like this: