Updates from July, 2011 Toggle Comment Threads | Keyboard Shortcuts

  • lczarnik 08:15 on July 30, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    fun 

    Was going to tag this as Humours, but on reflection is more Thought Provoking!

    ———- Forwarded message ———-
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 24 July 2011 11:23
    Subject: Fwd: fun

    — On Tue, 7/19/11,


     

     
    PARAPROSDOKIANS: "Figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation" (i.e. "Where there's a will, I want to be in it," is a type of paraprosdokian). 

    1. Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. 

    2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list. 

    3. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. 

    4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong. 

    5. We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public. 

    6. War does not determine who is right – only who is left. 

    7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. 

    8. Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't. 

    9. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research. 

    10. A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station. 

    11. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you. 

    12. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy. 

    13. Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman. 

    14. A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory. 

    15. I asked God for a new car, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a car, and asked for forgiveness. 

    16. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice. 

    17. Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with. 

    18. There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away. 

    19. I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.

    20. You're never too old to learn something stupid.

    21. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot f irst and call whatever you hit, a target. 

    22. Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

    23. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

    24. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. 

    25. A diplomat is someone who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you look forward to the trip. 

    26. Hospitality is making your guests feel at home even when you wish they were. 

    27. I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon, and a shot of tequila. 

    28. When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. 

     


     

     

     

     
  • lczarnik 08:10 on July 30, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    Pics and song 

    God has given us a beautiful world. We should ensure we really look at it, look after it and thank him every day for it.
    ———- Forwarded message ———-
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 23 July 2011 06:49
    Subject: Fw: Pics and song

    Subject: Pics and song

    Depending on your musical tastes, you will either like this or maybe not…

    but the photos are spectacular!
    Such is life.  The pics are amazing!  
     
     
     
  • lczarnik 08:01 on July 30, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    Horniest Guy On Earth 

    ———- Forwarded message ———-
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 22 July 2011 03:14
    Subject: Fwd: Horniest Guy On Earth

    For those who love good music.

    http://www.funuc.com/?p=402

     
  • lczarnik 07:58 on July 30, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    Lost Wallet and Car Keys – wmv 

    ———- Forwarded message ———-
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 18 July 2011 22:26
    Subject: Fwd: Lost Wallet and Car Keys – wmv

    This may have been around but we still enjoyed.  BA 

    > "To obtain a favorable response from people, it is better to
    > offer something for their stomachs than for their brains."
    > Albert Einstein

     
  • lczarnik 07:53 on July 30, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    Granny’s PIE 

    ———- Forwarded message ———-
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 17 July 2011 03:34
    Subject: Fw: Granny's PIE

    

    I couldn't pass up sending this.  Just to cool
     

    
    Granny's PIE

    (and other profound observations)



     












     

    A Hug is like a perfect gift.  
    One size fits all and nobody minds if you exchange it.

    May your troubles be less,

    Your blessing be more,

    And nothing but happiness

    come through your door


    Att6Att3Att5Att7Att2Att8Att4Att1

     
  • lczarnik 07:46 on July 30, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    seatbelt law 

    ———- Forwarded message ———-
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 16 July 2011 11:53
    Subject: Fw:seatbelt law

     
    —– Original Message —–

    From:
    Sent: Thursday, July 14, 2011 10:46 AM
    Subject: Fw:

     —– 
    New Seat Belt Law
    This becomes effective  1st Jan 2012.
    The National Highway Safety Council has done extensive
    Testing on a newly Designed seat belt.
    Results show that accidents can be reduced by as much as 95%
    When the belt is properly installed.
    Correct Installation is illustrated below…….
    Please pass on to family and friends.
    THIS MAY HELP SAVE A LIFE!
     
     
     
    Image001111
    This can really save lives and lower blood pressure by 40%
     
     

     
  • lczarnik 07:44 on July 30, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    3 D PRINTER…UNREAL! 

    Now this is REALLY amazing.  Next best thing to Star Trek transporter.

    ———- Forwarded message ———-
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 11 July 2011 06:39
    Subject: Fw: Fw: Fwd: Fw: Fwd: 3 D PRINTER…UNREAL!

     
    —– Original Message —– How bout this!!!

    ——– Original Message ——–

    Subject: Fw: Fwd: Fw: Fwd: 3 D PRINTER…UNREAL!
    Date: Fri, 8 Jul 2011 14:47:35 -0400 (Eastern Daylight Time)
    From: John
    To:

    ——-Original Message——-
    Date: 7/8/2011 1:16:28 PM
    ———- Forwarded message ———-
    To: Juanita
    ———- Forwarded message ———-

    From: Date: Fri, Jul 8, 2011 at 9:13 AM

    This is truly impossible, but here tis!

    Pretty Amazing!

    This will freak you out. The possibilities of this printer are unlimited. 

    3D PRINTER… 

    Check out this video on YouTube.

    Remember the three R's:

    Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions. 

     
  • lczarnik 07:30 on July 30, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    Its Amazing…!!! This is crazy. – guess someone famous 

    ———- Forwarded message ———-
    From: Ralph & BA
    Date: 10 July 2011 06:44
    Subject: Fwd: Its Amazing…!!! This is crazy.

    Begin forwarded message:

     

     

    Think of someone who is famous before answering the questions.

     
     
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