In anticipation of upcoming Mother’s Day –

WHEN GOD CREATED MOTHERS

When the Good Lord was creating mothers, He was into His sixth day of ‘overtime’ when an angel appeared

and said, “You’re doing a lot of fiddling around on this one”.

And the Lord said, “Have you read the specs on this order? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have 180 movable parts – all replaceable, run on black coffee and leftovers, have a lap that disappears when she stands up, a kiss that can cure anything from a broken leg to a disappointed love affair and six pairs of hands.” The angel shook its head and said, “Six pairs of hands? No Way.”

“It’s not the hands that are causing the problems,” said the Lord. “It’s the three pairs of eyes that mothers have to have.” “That’s on the standard model?” asked the angel. The Lord nodded and said, “One pair that sees through closed doors when she asks, What are you kids doing in there?” when she already knows. An-
other pair here in the back of her head that sees what she shouldn’t but what she has to know and, of course, the ones here in front that can look at a child when he goofs up and say, “I understand and I love you” without so much as uttering a word.”

“Lord,” said the angel, touching His sleeve gently, “go to bed. Tomorrow…” “I can’t”, answered the Lord. “I am so close to creating something so close to myself. Already I have one who heals herself when she is sick, feeds a family of six on one pound of hamburger and gets a nine-year old to stand under a shower.”

The angel circled the model of a mother very slowly. “It’s too soft,” it sighed. “But tough!” said the Lord excitedly. “You cannot imagine what this mother can do or endure.” “Can it think?” asked the angel. “Not only can it think,” said the Creator, “it can reason and compromise.”

Finally, the angel bent over and ran a finger across the cheek. “There’s a leak,” it pronounced. “I told you that you were trying to put too much into this model.” “That’s not a leak, said the Lord, “it’s a tear.” “What’s it for?” asked the angel. “Tears are for joy, sadness, pain, loneliness and pride,” answered the Lord. “You are a genius,” said the angel.

The Lord looked sombre. “I did not put it there.”

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