Advice For Retired People

Forwarded message
From: Ralph & BA
Date: 19 March 2014 07:46
Subject: Fw: Fwd: Advice For Retired People

Advice for retired people

Questions and Answers from AARP Forum
Q:Where can men over the age of 60 find younger, sexy women who are interested in them? A:Try a bookstore, under fiction.
Q:What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause? A:Keep busy. If you’re handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you’re done you’ll have a place to live.
Q:Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the bible. Isthat true?

Where canitbefound?

A:Yes. Matthew 14:92:

"And Mary rode Joseph’s ass

all the way to Egypt .."

Q:How can you increase the heart rate of your 60-plus year old husband? A:Tell him you’re pregnant.
Q:How can you avoid that

terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?

A:Take off your glasses.
Q:Seriously! What can I do for these Crow’s feet and all those wrinkles on my face? A:Go braless. It will usually pull them out.
Q:Why should 60-plus year old people use valet parking? A:Valets don’t forget where they park your car.
Q:Is it common for 60-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage? A:Storing memory is not a problem, Retrieving it is the problem.
Q:As people age, do they sleep more soundly? A:Yes, but usually in the afternoon.
Q:Where should 60-plus year olds look for eye glasses? A:On their foreheads.
Q:What is the most common remark made by 60-plus year olds when they enter antique stores? A:"Gosh, I remember these!"
SMILE, You’ve still got your sense of humor, RIGHT?